I, Sarah Adams take you,
Lawson Kuti as my lawful wedded husband, to love and to cherish, in sickness
and in health, till death do us part” she smiled at him through her veil.
“You may now kiss your bride
Mr. Lawson” The Pastor beckoned.
Lawson’s heart raced as he
gently unveiled his bride’s face. She looked so beautiful. He gently bent over
and placed a soft kiss on her lips. Sarah in turn embraced him tightly with
tears of joy streaming down her face.
“Never leave me Sarah” He
whispered in her ear.
“I will never leave you” she
whispered and they slowly released themselves from the embrace.
“I present to you the latest
couple!” The Pastor exclaimed excitedly
The church cheered and Sarah
cried more in her husband’s arms
5 years Later
Sarah silently tip toed
behind her husband. He was in his study, engrossed in reading. She smiled to
herself and gently covered his eyes with both hands.
“It’s just you and I in this
house Sara, plus, I smelled you the moment you walked in” He dropped
Sara released her hold,
sighed and sat on the study table, “Why do you figure me out so easily? I can’t
even surprise you! That sucks” she curled her arms around his neck
“You are my wife, nothing you
do is supposed to surprise me” He playfully pecked her nose.
“But you’ve been in the study
all day and I’m bored!” She rolled her eyes
“So what kind of fun do you
suggest we have then?” He swooped her off the table in his arms
“No! no that kind of fun!”
She hit him playfully till he put her down
“Ok”, He folded his arms on
his chest, looking into her eyes, “So what do you want us to do?”
“Not us. Actually, all I want
is to play with your play station and you’ve hidden it again! Just give it to
me and you can continue your reading, pleaaaseee” She blinked her eyes
playfully
“No way”, He went back toward
his study chair and sat, “Not my play station”
“Why! You never let me touch
it…like its your baby” She sulked
“Well”, he rolled his eyes,
“Not like you’ve given me a baby yet”
Sara paused for a moment. Did
he just say that to her? The words struck her deep down
“You shouldn’t have said that
Lawson…” She managed to say, her countenance changing.
“But it’s true…I’m only
saying the truth Sara” He turned to face her, still sitting on the chair.
“The truth? You think I don’t
want us to have kids?”
“Don’t get me wrong, I’m not
saying that…” He stood to face her now.
“Then what are you saying
Lawson? Tell me, what is the truth?”
“Let’s not do this
today…please. You can have the play station and play all you want. It’s in my footwear
locker and the key is in my Bible”
“You always do this…hurting
me with your words” Her voice began to shake
“Don’t start Sara please”
“Tell me why you said those
words to me! I want to know!”
“Because I’m tired! I want to
be a father! I want to have my own kids Sara…”
” and you think I don’t?!”
Sara flared, trying not to let the tears pour
“Then why can’t you get
pregnant Sara? This is the fifth year we are trying.” He clenched his teeth and
walked out of the study room.
Sara was in shock. She sat on
the chair for some seconds, stood up again and sat on the chair again…this time
she held on to her blouse and burst into tears.
2weeks after
“Lawson, wake up please” Sara
tapped him
Lawson gently opened his eyes
and looked at the alarm clock by his bedside, “It’s 2:00am Sara…”
“It’s urgent”
“I’m listening” He said
drowsily
“Mother says we should come
for tests. She says she’s spoken to her doctor and he said we should come.”
“What?” Lawson opened his
eyes now, “Your mother is in the UK for Christ’s sakes”
“Let’s just do it. We can go
for the weekend, lets just give it a shot, please.”
“No. That would be rather
expensive and…”
“It’s my birthday today and
the only thing I want from you is this trip”
Lawson fell quiet now. For
the past two years now, his wife’s birthday skips his mind…totally.
“I’m…I’m sorry Sara…It
skipped my mind…”
“It always does” She lay down
back on the bed, backing him.
Lawson wrapped his arms
around her waist, “I said I’m sorry…”
No response.
Lawson sighed, “Fine, we go
this weekend”
“Really?” She turned sharply,
excited
“If it will make you happy
today”
“Thank you baby” She hugged
him.
A week after
Sara jerked at the vibration
of the phone in her pocket.
“Hi mom!” she pressed the
phone to her ear with her shoulders, wiping the washed dishes with her hands.
“Honey…”
“What is it mom?” she pressed
it harder
“The result…the result of the
tests…” her mother cried
Sarah gently dropped the
plate and the wiper, hear racing…”Just say it mom…”
That night
“I can never have children
Lawson…” Sara cried
Lawson felt his world crash
right in front of him, “W…what?”
“Mama called today…she’s
gotten the tests results”
“Jesus Christ” Lawson stood,
placing his palm on his head, “b…but you told me you were ok before we got
married, you told me the doctor said your abortion didn’t damage your womb”
“Don’t bring my past into
this!” Sara flared
Lawson laughed and got
serious almost immediately, “You are crazy. I married a crazy woman!”
Sara looked at him in shock,
like he’d lost his mind.
“The results say you can
never have children and we both know that this has to do with the abortion you
had before we met!”, he flared, “are you happy?…you know we’re screwed right?
No kids? what re we going to tell the world?”
“Lawson we can adopt…” Sara
cried
“Adopt? Wow!”, he laughed
again, “I married a funny woman too!” He got serious again, “Its still not our
baby! The damn baby is not my flesh and blood! You are full of deceit Sara” He
looked into her eyes. Sara could see him fighting his tears.
“Lawson stop…you are hurting
me…” Sara fell on her knees crying
“You want to know what I’m
thinking?” Lawson looked at her with disgust, “I’m thinking how
on earth I’m going to stand
seeing your deceitful face for the rest of my life”
“Sara cried harder, “Dont
give up Lawson…So far I have a womb…I can still carry our baby…”
“I am not giving up on having
my baby, I’m giving up on you” Lawson turned around to leave
“Lawson!” She held his feet,
“I’m hurting too…”
He only dragged his feet from
her hold and drove out of the house. She wept.
A month Later
“Mother, he’s not even
talking to me. All of a sudden we are both strangers…He doesn’t eat my food,
comes home late…he hates me so much and it’s killing me. I’m confused…to think
that it’s truly hurting…”
“For how long will you hide
this truth from him. You’ve got to let him know…you can’t carry his…”
There was the sound of a car
horn
“Mom I’ve got to go…he’s
back”
“Baby, you’ve got to let him
know. It can work when you two are one in mind”
“Bye mom” she ended the call.
Lawson came into the house,
about to walk past her.
“Lawson” She held him
“I’m tired” He didn’t want to
look at her face
“I know…can we talk for some
minutes?” She tried to help him remove his suit
“Look what is it” He jerked
from her
“Do you hate me this much?
you can’t even look me in the eye? you can’t even stand my sight? Lawson…it’s
me Sara…your best friend…” Her eyes grew moist
“I’m in no mood for this” He
turned around to walk away
“Don’t you dare leave when
I’m talking to you!” She dragged him by the suit. Just then, some papers fell
to the floor. Sara quickly bent to pick them up…her hands shook and her body
became numb all over.
“D…divorce papers? Lawson?”
She searched his eyes
“Answer me goddammit!” She
held him by the collar of his shirt, crying
“They are for you to sign. I
want to be out” Lawson dropped
“Y…you what?” she slowly
freed him from her hold
“It’s not going to work Sara,
can’t you see?”
“Lawson I can’t believe you
would think of a divorce and even go this far…why are you so wicked!” she
cried, angry
“No! Why are you so wicked!”
He retorted, flaring
“Think about me for once. I
am a man for Christ’s sakes. My children are my pride! and you are about to
deny me that for the rest of my life because of your silly mistake!”
“What about me! have you
stopped for once to think about what I’m going through”
“It’s your cross, carry it”
Lawson fixed his angry eyes on his wife
“No, its now our cross and I
am not signing those divorce papers! We vowed never to leave each other!”
“Isn’t it better Sara that
you save yourself more hurt and sign these papers than to see another woman
move into this house before your very eyes?” he said with a tone of sarcasm
Sara’s heart thumped, “What?”
“You heard me…another woman
who can help raise a family, so save yourself the stress and sign the damn
papers. I need it tomorrow”He turned around to leave again
“She still can’t carry your
baby” Sara dropped
“Not all women had abortions.
Not every woman was like you.” He scorned
“You are the one who can’t
give me a child!” Sara let out, crying.
Lawson stopped now, turned
around and walked towards her, “Whatever your plan is won’t work”
“I told you I could never
have a child because its you who can’t make me pregnant”
“Shut up! shut up Sara! what
the hell are you saying!” He shook her shoulders violently
“You are infertile Lawson…the
doctor says you have primary infertility…” Sara burst into tears
Lawson gasped, loosing his
balance.
“Mother called me to give me
the news. I was shattered, I felt like my world was over but more importantly I
thought of you. I thought of what the news could do to you, I thought of the
best way to tell you… never for once did i think of leaving you. I bore your
insults, your scorn, because of my past. It was so easy to judge me and think
of yourself. I am the one who is hurting, I am the one who should bring some
miserable divorce papers…but I thought of you…I thought of hope, faith and a
miracle…I thought of my vow to you on that altar. In sickness and in health
remember?”, she smiled through her tears, “all of a sudden you are as weak as a
baby…looking in your eyes, I can see you sudenly have lost all your guards, You
are so wicked”
“Sara…” Lawson fell on his
knees, torn.
“No!” She quickly fell on her
knees too, “No Lawson…” She couldn’t bear to see him cry
“I’m…I’m infertile”, he
cried, “What is left of me?” he searched his wife’s eyes
“Lawson please…” she held his
face, “I understand…it has been so hard for me…I have put myself in your shoes
since the first day…”
“You don’t deserve this…you
deserve better…I can’t believe I scorned you all along…please let me leave you”
“No” she shook her head, “You
are my husband. I won’t leave you. I won’t let you leave me…I believe in miracles”
“I’m doomed…Sara I’m
doomed…”He allowed his wife take him in her arms and on her shoulder he wept
like a child.
In the Morning
Sara gently opened her eyes,
looking beside her bed…it was empty. She quickly sat up on seeing a note gently
placed on the bed. Hands shaking, she opened the letter to read.
Sara,
I cannot bear the shame. I
have treated you so unfairly, yet you love me still, you are with me even in
this condition of mine. To think that you knew all along and you never for once
gave me a clue that it is my fault we are in this mess, makes me so unworthy of
you. I love you enough to let you build another life with a man who can make
you happier. I’m torn Sara and all I ask is your forgiveness. I have always
loved you and if you truly love me then please start your life over
again…without me…I am truly sorry for disappointing you.
Lawson.
Sara couldn’t control the
tears. She couldn’t think straight anymore. She picked her cell phone, shaking…
“Hi Mr. Lawson’s office
please”
“Hi Lola…” she cried, “have
you seen my husband today?”
“No…no ma’am, we’ve been
expecting him at work. He has a presentation is fifteen minutes”
“Oh God…God…” Sara dipped her
hand in her full hair
“Everything ok ma’am?”
“Thank you” she ended the
call.
She quickly got down from the
bed and in her pyjamas she ran into her car. She dialed his number repeatedly
as she drove…no answer.
At 2:00pm
She sped into Fred’s
compound, a close friend to her husband.
“Fred!” she banged the door
hastily till the door flung open
“My God Sara what’s wrong?”
Fred held her
“It’s…it’s Lawson…have you
seen him? is he here?”
“No…Haven’t heard from him in
a week”
“Oh God” she held her hair
“What’s wrong?”
But she was already walking
away into her car.
“Sara!” He called after her.
She zoomed away.
4:30pm
“Mom, Dad, I can’t find
Lawson…I can’t find your son…” she cried as she paced in front of the two who
looked lost
“You have to calm down and
tell us what happened” Lawson’s mother put her arms around Sara.
Sara burst into tears, “Please
Dad could you try his number, maybe he’d pick your call?”
“Have you been to his
office?” He picked his cellphone and dialed his son’s number
“I have been everywhere I
know him to be likely available”
“It’s ok…calm down please”
Lawson’s mother pet her
“He’s not picking. What
exactly went wrong between you two?” Lawson’s father searched Sara’a eyes
9:00pm
Sara was still in her pyjamas
and on her way back home, exhausted and stuck in the traffic. She had told
Lawson’s parents everything. The poor couple was so shattered and also begging
her to begin a new life. Sara buried her head on the steering, crying; she
hadn’t realized the green light.
“Hey get off the freaking
road!” a driver cursed from behind her
“God please don’t let him
harm himself…keep him safe and lead me to him…please God…” she quickly started
the car and began to move.
Suddenly she remembered the
church where they wedded and took their vows. It was two hours from here; she
made a u-turn and headed for the church hoping to find some peace.
She tiredly got down from the
car, drenched and exhausted. She trudged into the open entrance of the church.
She paused for a moment; shocked…it was Lawson sitting at the front row of the
empty church, facing the altar.
“Lawson!” She began to run
towards him, happy, relieved that he was ok.
“Sara?” He quickly stood as
she approached him, “Sara…”
They both ran into each
other’s arms. He hugged her so tightly
“I looked for you
everywhere….this was the last place I thought you’d ever be…I just came and
I saw you…Lawson….I’m so happy you are ok” she touched his face
“I didn’t know where else to
go…It just feels like I cant face the world anymore…” he slowly released her
from his embrace.
“Take my hand” Sara stretched
out her hand, “C’mon, just take it”
Lawson gently clasped his
hand into hers and she took him to the altar and stood to face him. She
searched his eyes so deeply and hadn’t seen him so weak and helpless.
“Five years ago Lawson, we
both stood on this altar. Remember our vows? Remember you whispered in my ear
never to leave you. I told you I wouldn’t…that’s why I’m here. I am your
wife Lawson, I am meant to be with you forever, though the bad and good times.
We’ve had good times, why would I leave you now? All I want from you is to
believe that you can still give me a child despite what the result said…I want
you to believe in a miracle”, she held his face, “remember when you told me I
was a miracle in your life?…our children will be our miracles too. Trust God
with me because I know it won’t be long…”
“Who are you Sara…” Lawson
was weak with her words
“The one who vowed to be with
you till the end” she smiled through her thin tears
“God I love you so much Sara”
He hugged her again
“So will you come back home
with me?” Sara searched his eyes
“I have no other place to
call home” He placed a soft kiss on her lips.
2 years after
Lawson and Sara were on the
sofa watching a late night movie. Sara was resting on his shoulders when she
felt the movement
“Lawson Lawson, it moved
again…don’t miss it this time touch touch” she gently placed his palm on the
side of the stomach. Both felt the movement of their child
“I can feel him…I can feel
him” Lawson placed his head on her belly
“I can feel him growing each
day inside of me…”
“What do you think its saying
now by this movement?”
“Thank you dada for believing
in me” she laughed. They both laughed “The movement has stopped” he slowly
removed his head from her stomach, “I think he’s sleeping”
Sara rested on his shoulders
again, “In six months you’d be a father, “You finally got your miracle”
Lawson tilted his wife’s face
to him, looking into her eyes, “Sara…you were the miracle I needed. Thank you
for not leaving me.”
Sara tickled his nose with
hers, “I love you too. Always will”, she smiled, “We missed a whole lot on our
movie”
“Movie can wait, but this
can’t” He gently planted a kiss on her belly.
Hi Friends,
First, we forget our vows so
easily, so quickly that once our m
arriages start hitting the
rocks, we fail to realize that there is power in union. When there is union,
every mountain can be subdued. The problem is people don’t yet understand the
concept of marriage and trust me, until you do, please don’t go to the alter
because what you don’t understand will eventually become a burden and confuse
you. The concept of marriage is ‘for better, for worse’. The ‘worse’ moments
always come. I am not saying expect bad things but I’m saying that challenges
come in marriage to make you stronger in oneness so don’t use it against
yourselves.
Second, miracles are real and
I hope we all learn to have the patience to have our miracles in the end.
Remember that marriage is a ‘stick and stay’ relationship not a ‘hit and run’ thing.
Remember your vows each day,
enjoy!!!!!!!
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