THE DILEMA OF THE FIRST BORN. part one

This post goes out to all firstborns in African households. By firstborn I mean that you are a first child in that family (the first to be born), and as a first child there are things you go through that other children just won’t understand, Others will not feel your pain, when you are acting all silent and moody, then someone says… “Oh! She’s the first born” and another person says “No wonder…”And when you’re wondering why your junior ones are getting all the cool nicknames (likePrince), but you got the most traditional names in your village (Olatunji Olakunle Bright Jnr)… and still the pastor made sure your baptismal name is AUGUSTUS And when you read the bible story of Jacob and Esau, and Esau lost his birth right, but somehow Esau is still the bad guy for being hungry…

Sometimes the society doesn’t realize the subtle oppression it puts you through.. But this post will surely feel your pain. This post will bring your silent struggles to light. Your many silent struggles. And why you struggle so. Saying firstborn is a hell of a lot tiring so I’ll just shorten it to FIBI, so dear readers, anytime you see FIBI in this post, know that it means firstborn okay? Let’s go…

1.  The Pregnancy

Being FIBI means you were the first pregnancy your parents ever had to deal with, and with the first pregnancy comes the most anxiety and fear Simple which means when you were conceived, your mother was anxious because she was new to the experience of pregnancy. ..Before, she was thinking of new shoes and hairstyles and P Square’s album is coming out next week…now she is gaining weight, her hormones are dancing, all these people want to touch her belle…When you were conceived as FIBI, your father was new to the responsibility and the changes as well.

Before he was thinking of English Premier League and Buhari’s new budget…now he’s thinking of Pampers and School Fees and Praying his wife is okay.This atmosphere of anxiety could haunt you forever.

2. Experimentation

Now, because your parents were new to the experience of having you, there were probably more mistakes in raising you than raising your junior ones. (You know, from lack of experience)

As FIBI you are “the experiment baby”.

Your parents did not understand much about your growth. Your younger brothers and sisters did not feel this because your parents had built up the experience from having you.

I’ll give an example, when FIBI starts teething, because the mother is new to the experience, she might think  “What the hell is happening to my child? Why is there Saliva everywhere?”But when the second or third born starts teething, she can tell the difference because

“Oh Junior is teething, I remember when it happened to FIBI.” This is why the second and third born may be growing faster than you, even though you’re eating the same food. They know how it works now.