Imagine if you could do anything in the world
without feeling fear or any negative feelings whatsoever. The fear of failure
is instilled in us from early childhood because of overly protective parents.
It’s not easy to hear the words “No!” over and over again. After awhile you
start getting cautious about what you do. You constantly look to an authority
figure to see if it’s okay.As we grow, this negative belief becomes
unconscious. You don’t even know it’s there. You just live your life as best as
you can.
1. Identify
the Root Cause
“Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat.”
— F. Scott Fitzgerald
Where does your fear of failure originate?
Sit down, take a few deep breaths, ask yourself when
your fear of failure was formed, and observe what you see, feel, or hear.
When you see what caused your fear of failure,
you’ll also see that your mind’s interpretation is far from accurate.
If your parents were overly protective, or if you
had a particularly strict teacher, you’ll see that they did it because they
want the best for you.
It’s easy to see how the you of the past interpreted
events as he or she did. But if you look at the event as an outsider, you will
see that it had nothing to do with you.
It’s crucial to examine all of your negative
beliefs, because they have a big influence on how you live
your life.
2. Simplify
“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.” —
Leonardo da Vinci
Complexity is hard to visualize, and if you try, you
will feel overwhelmed. Everything will feel hopeless and not worth doing,
because you just don’t know how.
When I began my online journey,
I was overwhelmed to say the least. I had no idea of where to go, what to do,
or how to do it.
When I simplified the tasks that I needed to do, it
all became much easier. I had no problem taking action because I had broken
everything down into actionable pieces.
And if I didn’t know what to do, I’d ask someone, or
join a training program.
I took the task of starting a website and broke it
down to coming up with a domain name, buying hosting, getting a website up and
running, and getting a simple design.
It also didn’t hurt that I was determined to make it
work. If you don’t have that fire burning inside of you, you should think twice
about moving forward.
Find your passion, and boldly go where you have
never gone before.
3. Failure is
Inevitable
“It is foolish to fear what you cannot avoid.” —
Publius Syrus
Let’s face it, failure is inevitable if you want to
live a remarkable life. I know you want to live a life full of passion,
meaning, and purpose.
We all do.
But it’s not going to happen if you succumb to your
fears and try to look for a more comfortable way out, because there is none.
Sooner or later you will have to overcome the fear
of failure, and you will have to overcome many other fears during your
lifetime.
Sometimes it’s overwhelming, frustrating, and
exhausting. I know, I’ve been there, but the more you move through tough
periods, the faster you’ll grow.
If you want the life of your dreams, make failure a
part of your life.
Embrace it.
4. Fail More.
Succeed More.
“There is no failure. Only feedback.” — Robert Allen
The more you fail, the more you succeed.
I was lucky to learn that lesson early in my life.
When I became a professional poker player, I was 18, and I already knew that
the more feedback I got, the faster I would learn.
I crave constructive criticism. It is a chance for
me to improve what I’m doing.
I never assume that I know it all, nor do I assume
that I am above failure. Even the most successful people fail every single day.
The difference between the successful and the
not-yet-successful is the realization that failure is simply a stepping stone,
not a permanent event.
5. Failure is
Temporary
“Failure is an event, never a person.” — William D.
Brown
Failure feels permanent, but it isn’t. You and I
both know that, but we don’t act like it is so.
You may imagine yourself failing and the movie in
your head stops there. If you let the movie play, you will realize that that
failure may be exactly what you needed.
It may be the messenger of the lesson you needed to
succeed down the road. Failure isn’t easy, but it is what will make you the
person you want to become.
I’ve failed more times than I can count, yet I still
fear failure. The difference now versus when I was in my late teens is that I
know that the fear of failure is just a thought.
It conjures up feelings in my body that feel bad. It
has no bearing in reality. It is often exaggerated and out of control.
Most people never stop to observe their thoughts.
And they never stop to ponder that their thoughts could be wrong.
Why give your thoughts all that authority if they
make you feel bad?
6. Free Your
Mind
“The mind is everything. What you think you become.”
— Buddha
See your thoughts for what they are … thoughts.
Thoughts can be eliminated, feelings can be
alleviated, and fears can be overcome.
You can do this by taking massive action and facing
your fears. You can also use methods such as The Work, EFT, and meditation.
I have personally been using EFT since I was 16. I
have been meditating on and off for the same time. And I recently got
acquainted with The Work.
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