Carmine Gallo
said in his experience coaching executives on their communication and
presentation skills, I can tell you that many, if not most, wealthy, famous,
and successful business leaders currently struggle or have struggled with
speaking in public. I’ve also discovered that there are three
effective ways to deal with the fear of public speaking.
1. Manage
your fear. Academic researchers in the field of communication tell me
that it’s nearly impossible to rid ourselves completely of the fear. It’s
natural and ingrained from thousands of years of evolution where human beings
needed to be accepted in social groups in order to survive. Our primitive
ancestors who didn’t care about the impression they made on others
were cast out of the tribe or village. That’s not a good thing when a tiger is
lurking around the corner. In other words, it’s perfectly acceptable, natural,
and understandable towant to be liked. In fact leaders who are not nervous at
all about speaking are often unsuccessful at delivering presentations precisely
because they don’t care about how they come across. Successful public speakers
learn to manage their fear and not to eliminate it.
2. Reframe
your thoughts. The world famous minister, Joel Osteen, sells out
places like Yankee Stadium and speaks live to 40,000 a week who visit Lakewood
church every Sunday (the mega-church meets in Houston at the former Compaq
Center). Osteen says the week before his first sermon in 1999 marked the worst
days of his life. “I was scared to death,” he says. At the time he knew very
little about speaking or preparing a message. In fact he was perfectly content
to sit behind the video camera during his father’s sermons. When his father
passed away, Osteen’s wife and family encouraged him to take the stage.
Osteen did not overcome his fear for a long time.
The conversations he heard didn’t help. “I overheard two ladies say,
‘he’s not as good as his father.’ I was already insecure and—boom—another
negative label.” Words, he says, are like seeds. If you dwell on them long
enough they take root and you will become what those words say you’ll become—if
you let them. Osteen says negative labels—the ones people place on us and the
labels we place on ourselves— prevent us from reaching our potential.
I find that leaders who are nervous about speaking
in public say the most awful things to themselves—words that they would never
say to anyone else. I’ve heard leaders say:
I’m terrible at giving presentations.
I got nervous once and it ruined me. I’m a horrible
public speaker.
Nobody wants to listen to me. I’m boring.
If these are the type of phrases you repeat to
yourself day after day, it’s no wonder you get nervous! You can’t control what
other people say about you, like the two ladies that Osteen overheard, but you
can control how you frame those comments and you can most certainly control the
things you tell yourself. Osteen said those negative labels played in his mind
again and again: You’re not good enough. You don’t have what it takes.
Those women are right; you’ll never be as good as your father. Osteen’s
confidence grew as he replaced those negative labels with words of
encouragement, empowerment, and strength. “Wrong labels can keep you from your
destiny,” he says.
3. Do what
you fear. Alot. Professional golfers get nervous standing over a
3-foot putt to win the tournament. They’ve managed to control their
nerves, however, because they’ve practiced the shot thousands of
times. They rely on muscle memory to help them manage their nerves (again, not
to eliminate those nerves completely). It’s the same with public speaking. The
more you speak, the more comfortable you’ll be. If you only give one
presentation every six months, of course you’ll be nervous. It feels unnatural
because you don’t do it that often.
Enrolling in a public-speaking course was a good
first step to helping Buffett build his confidence as a public speaker. The
key, he said, was signing up to teach a night course at the University of
Nebraska—Omaha. Buffett taught investment principles to students twice his age.
He did it to force himself to stand up and talk to people. Once Osteen decided
to be the new pastor of Lakewood, he was forced to preach every week. Both
Buffett and Osteen improved their public speaking skills over time because they
did it over and over again.
You’re only as successful as your ideas. Landing a
dream job, persuading investors, inspiring employees, and attracting customers
all require the effective transmission of those ideas. Don’t let your nerves
get in the way of achieving your full potential. More important, if you recognize
that your nerves are a problem, take bold steps today to bring them under
control so they enhance—and not harm—your career.
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